The Undervalued Skill of Soft Skills

What would you say if I suggested that the reason why things aren’t going as well as you would like them to be going is because what you think is the problem is not the actual problem?

In the entrepreneurial space, we often get obsessively focused on the wrong things. We think that the task work that we committed to is what needs to be improved. We focus deeply on the lead magnet that we are creating, the website we are updating or the email nurture sequence that all the gurus said that we had to have. 

But that stuff really doesn’t matter as much as you think it does. 

Unless you are a multiple six-figure business that is scaling up, those things are not nearly as important as your own communication skills. 

And you are thinking, “this guy wants me to focus on my communication skills over all of these other important things?”

Yes. Yes I do. 

People buy from people. There are thousands of lead magnets being created daily, all built to collect our email addresses. There are websites being optimized down to the smallest details. But do you want to know the sad truth?

Few people care. 

I don’t care. Neither does just about everyone else. That’s why there are entrepreneurs from coast to coast banging their heads against the wall because they can’t grow their email list, And once they finally get people on their list, they can’t get people to buy. I just heard from someone who put something on sale on his email list- a large, engaged list- and .00003 percent of the people on the list bought the product. 

Sounds depressing, right?

Good. Maybe that is a wake-up call to those who are so focused on content and not on communication. 

I just received an email from someone that fits the description of the subject above. She puts out tons of content through a podcast, a blog and social media posts. Yet, she can’t get out of her own way when it comes to actually creating a profitable business. I see what she’s doing, and it’s simple and clear what can be done to turn the ship around. 

Yet, it hasn’t happened. 

So she messaged me to talk about this. She didn’t ask to hire me. She just wanted me to help her. Now, I try to help friends all the time. But as I say often, generosity is on my terms.  The brief conversation that took place is more confirmation of why she’s struggling. I told her that I was available that afternoon. I wouldn’t charge-it would be a gift to her. 

She responded that she was doing something else, and that the next day would be better for her. 

Now, for most of society in 2024, that might be perfectly acceptable. Except that the mindset behind that response is why she’s struggling. 

Don’t see it?

  1. She didn’t ask if I would be interested in helping. She just assumed that I should and would. 
  2. She didn’t sound grateful at all. 
  3. She didn’t ask when a good time would be for me to talk.
  4. When I told her that I could talk, she just told me a different time that would work for her. 
  5. She never once said thank you. 

So, to her, it was a normal response. But because of a lack of soft skills, she immediately turned me off. In addition, I wasn’t willing to go back and forth on her schedule to help her…for free…without thanks. 

The problem is, she doesn’t know any of this. And I risk bad will and possibly even getting into an argument by letting her know this. So I choose not to, as much as I’d love to. If she ever asks, I will be the first to tell her.

And the lack of self awareness and soft skills hurts business more than not having an email nurture sequence or an updated lead magnet ever will. 

The problem is, she is not just doing it just to me. She is doing it to potential clients. She is doing it to current and potential advertisers. She is doing it to fans of her work. And it turns people off left and right, and it eventually leads to them not wanting to work together. 

But she doesn’t even know it. Because she’s not focused on the soft skills that make-or-break relationships. Unfortunately, she will probably continue to struggle because she’s not interested in improving the areas that hold her back. 

How we communicate with other human beings matters. It matters more than ever because communication skills are at an all-time low. So, in reality, there is no better time to focus on this because it’s so lacking across the board, that just learning some of this will make you stand out in the crowd. 

Even if you don’t care about being liked more, it’s just good for business. Communication matters. And a lack of soft skills could be the reason you aren’t making more cold hard cash. 

Have an AMAZING week!



Nobody Goes There Anymore, It’s Too Crowded

Yogi Berra was the catcher for the New York Yankees for nineteen seasons, making it to fourteen World Series and winning a remarkable ten world championships.  Yet Berra is remembered for his “Yogi-isms” as much as he is remembered for his incredible success on the baseball field. Many of those Yogi-ism’s are still used today. 

Read More »

Avoid The Trap of The Service Based Business Owner

Often, the very thing that gets you out of a painful spot will be the very thing holding you back from achieving the next level- and causing the next major pain point.  The idea of running your own business, controlling your time and living life on your own terms is most likely appealing to you. 

Read More »

If You Ever Feel Stuck- This Is The Place To Start

All it takes is one great connection to change the course of your life or your business.  Often, when I talk with someone at the very beginning of their entrepreneurial journey- or someone making a pivot- and they ask where they should start, my first questions to them are about their connections, network and friendships. 

Read More »

The Magic of The Unique Blend

How excited would the average candy lover feel if you handed them a regular piece of milk chocolate? I think the level of excitement would be relatively low. What about if you gave them a glob of peanut butter? Not excited for that either, you say?  Yet, by some estimates, the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup is the

Read More »

Why It’s Good For The Soul To Turn Down The Wrong Clients

It is good for the soul to turn down the wrong potential clients. I have said that line for years, but I was reminded of it strongly this past week. In the past twenty-four hours, I turned down two potential clients for our Membership Freedom community who were interested in joining.  What’s interesting is that,

Read More »

Three Years To Greatness

It takes three years to build it right.   The short-term thinkers hate to hear it. The impatient don’t buy it. But time and time again, it’s proven true. It takes three years to build something from the ground up and make it great.  I say this to every new member of Membership Freedom. I don’t

Read More »